Love this thing is not easy, just from the beginning of ambiguity, how to continue to keep each other want to see you, want to explore of the good feeling, really need to display some small tricks ah!

Youve been dating for a while. How do you stay hot?

Show vulnerability

Action indicators: Not necessarily, but to date more than once, decide that the other person at least have a good feeling for you

Showing ones vulnerable side is an operation that varies from person to person. Generally speaking, people will tend to show their vulnerable side to someone who has enough trust, so when we receive the signal that this person is a bit vulnerable now, Unconsciously, the feeling of we have a good relationship and he trusts me will occur. This is the effect this step aims to achieve.

But you must pay special attention to the following situations: first, whether you yourself look very weak, need to be protected, if so, then this method in your body is not effective. If not, you seem independent, then this method is perfect for you; Two, how often do you use it? Do you always seem broken and sad? If so, reduce your frequency and do not use this method specifically. If you look happy or brave and strong every day, then its okay to be occasional; Third, vulnerability does not mean complaining, and the feeling of vulnerability is sad rather than angry. Showing vulnerability is not to give your negative emotions to the other party, you have to do just let the other party see you sad, sad, but you still have to bear your emotional responsibility.

If the other party only regards you as a friend, when you show vulnerability, you will basically only get patted or perfunctory, depending on the other partys personality and your friendship. But if the other person has a good feeling for you and sees you as an object, then when you show weakness, he will want to show what he thinks is good and attractive to deal with your state. But please dont hold your breath, because this side of him can be very bad. Ive heard guys comfort girls by saying, Dont cry. When you cry, you get mascara on your face and you look dirty. So in order to avoid the other persons performance is so bad that you collapse, I would suggest that you directly give instructions to the other person, which is less painful.

How you evaluate the other persons performance is one thing, but if you find that the other person at this time begins to pretend to be a MAN, handsome, bossy president, or especially gentle, inclusive, super positive energy Wait, there is a big difference from the usual state, then basically you can be sure that he has a crush on you. Showing vulnerability not only brings you closer together, but also gives the other person an opportunity to show off. Try to give the other person the opportunity to care for you and protect you, then he will feel that he is a useful man, and the sense of value is established again.

The trick is to pick the big bad things. People have wonderful sensory mechanisms, and when it comes to good things, we like to hear small ones; For bad things, its the bigger ones that make people feel.

What does that mean? Suppose you tell someone today that you have won the lotto jackpot, they may feel bad or resentful, because the good news is so great that it will only cause others to be jealous. But if you tell them you found a hundred dollars on the road, they will be happy for you. As for the bad part, small bad things make people think youre a complainer, but big bad things make people think youre trustworthy. For example, you say: I fell on the road today, good bad oh this is a complaint, but if you tell the other party: When I was a child, my father had an affair, during that time I was very sad, I feel that I did something wrong, because it does not belong to the level of nothing you can casually tell passers-by, so others will feel that they are trusted. Having said that, please remember that it is a big bad thing, not a big bad thing, if you suddenly tell each other that you want to kill yourself every day when two people are not really familiar with each other, then the other party will suddenly not know what to do.

So, when it comes to showing vulnerability, you can pick something a little bigger, not something you would say to someone casually, but not something that requires a strict level of secrecy. This level of events can both feel trusted, but it is also a level of events where you can handle your emotions on your own, and it is not too much of a burden for both parties.

integrate into life

Action indicator: Contact frequency increases significantly and remains stable

At this point, all the things that need to be done and prepared have been done, and we are ready to raise the heat of the relationship.

In this step, you try to keep the relationship hot, if you can, try to talk every day, even though you may have a lot of things to do, dont be lazy, it is important for your happiness. In addition, increase the frequency of your meetings and allow you to have as much physical interaction as possible. If you are talking about distance, it is necessary to find a way to meet, otherwise it can only be done by phone, but this requires more powerful chat ability and voice control, so it is generally not recommended.

Note that the meeting here does not necessarily mean a formal date. Having a late-night snack together after work, taking a thirty-minute walk in a nearby park, walking home with the other person, etc. are all considered meetings. Its a kind of thing, but if you are colleagues and seeing each other at work, it doesnt count.

The reason to emphasize meeting rather than dating is because the focus is on how many opportunities you have to get along with each other, and what are you doing when you do? As long as you can focus on each other during the time you spend together, it doesnt matter where you go. Instead of trying to arrange a long date, I prefer short but frequent meetings.

Long dates, which must be carefully planned and arranged in advance, coupled with the fact that the people on the date may pretend all day, can increase fatigue. And this feeling of special planning can make people feel special, but not part of life, that is, you are in his life is not a normal.

Short, frequent dates, on the other hand, are the opposite. Having a late night snack or going for a walk home together isnt special. Its something that happens every day. But because it is easy to happen, so it seems more life. The higher frequency allows each other to feel that the other is constantly present in their lives and become a part of their lives. And because there is no special plan and the time is short, everyone will not be too hard to install, and the overall relatively will not be so tired.

In the process of meeting, please increase the frequency of physical contact, slightly longer, and move the scope of contact to non-friend areas. This refers to areas such as the inside of the arm, the wrist, etc.

When your relationship has reached this level, be more proactive and dont wait for each other to date. Give the other person more straight balls, initiate conversations, tap the other person, ask the other person out, call him. There can still be hints, but explicit actions should be more, so that the other person clearly feel the change in the relationship. The ratio is about three interactions, at least once you initiate, but not more than two.

rely

Action indicators: Hot chat every day (or the degree of care of the other party significantly increased), meet more than three to five times

After the significant warming of the previous step, we begin to shape the relationship and prepare it for the next stage. So the last step in the dating period is to start shaping a more single relationship. First of all, the thing you have to do is to rely on each other a little, pull the other persons status in your heart, show more womens posture, and consolidate the good feeling that the other person thinks he is a man.

Its the same thing that makes you vulnerable: the stronger your character, the more effective it is to be dependent, not to be totally dependent on the other person, to still take independent responsibility for yourself, to make the other person feel wanted rather than needed.

The difference between being dependent and showing vulnerability is that: first, even if you come across as weak, you can rely on the other person, but please let him feel that you are not like this for everyone; Second, the frequency of dependence can not be too low, but please choose small, the other party can do things, such as occasionally accompany you home, accompany you to talk, accompany you to buy clothes Wait, dont pick too difficult things to each other, otherwise you will increase the chance of internal injury, and he thinks he cant do it will be very frustrated.

In addition, during this step, please control your voice more consciously. Although people will have differences in their voices when facing the objects they like, please know what you are doing consciously, rather than acting on instinct.

In addition to sweetening your voice when getting along, you can also try to make your voice closer, which is mainly used when talking on the phone. Close sound distance will make people feel we are close, because the sound distance also represents the relationship distance, we can not use the sound distance on the stage to speak to the colleague next door, but according to the actual distance at that time to sound, so conversely, when you talk to the other side of the phone in a very close voice, he is on the other side of the phone. The message We are close is received.

The final thing to do in this step is to eat up the other persons time, taking all of his free time as much as you and I can.

Why would you do that? First, it is important to lengthen your time together, this action on the one hand allows you to master the rhythm (he spends time on you every day, you do not know what is going on now?) On the other hand, it will let the other side not have too much time to develop with other objects, and it will slowly shape a single relationship.

You might be worried: But what if he thinks Im too clingy? Generally speaking, I am not too worried about this matter, because as I said before, it is in the case of you and I wish, not you have been forcing the other party to meet and chat. As long as both partners are willing to spend time with each other, most people are more inclined to be passionate or passionate about such frequent relationships than clingy. And this step is already very close to the ambiguous period, not to mention the ambiguous period in this book is still ruled by me with an extremely conservative definition, for the average person, even in the previous step is actually ambiguous. When people are ambiguous, the lines are blurred, and you dont return to sanity until the passion has passed, so you really dont have to worry too much.

The second reason to eat each others time is to bring the heat up. Basically, as long as the heat reaches a level and continues to maintain, there is no package in the middle, and the other party is not wrong, then it is very close to the communication. But if the heat has been unable to pull up, always maintained at the level of as if there is something, but as if there is nothing, then one party, or even both parties, will doubt whether the other party likes themselves. The longer it takes, the more likely it is that something will happen, or nothing will happen.

In this step that is about to enter ambiguity, please gather up the relationship that may exist on the other side by eating each others time, so that it can start as single as possible. And pay attention to let their opposite sex charm rise, as far as possible to let the other party feel that you are a woman, but a comfortable to get along with, and not boring woman.

If you were able to follow these steps during the dating period and properly handle your emotions and internal investments, then you should be on fire by now. And the relationship should have several conditions: first, the other party thinks you have a good relationship; Second, the other person thinks that you trust him, and even thinks that you are special; Third, the other person thinks he can contribute to you, and you do not take it for granted; Four, you are a part of each others lives.

Strange period of each others feelings for you, will be deepened in the appointment period, coupled with the accumulation of these four feelings, and now the favorable degree will mostly fall between 50 and 60, at this time, you can enter the ambiguous period.

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